Your very own CryptoPoops are programmatically generated with unique traits and backstory by the Ethereum smart contract, at the exact time you mint them. Those traits are stored in the ERC721 token itself, not a hosted file. Then they come to life in a 1080x1080 pixel image, and are stored on IPFS and pinned, so they’ll last as long as Ethereum does. Even if our servers go to shit.
Your CryptoPoops are unique, carefully crafted from more than 50 properties and millions of combinations. Many of them live lives of action and mystery, as you’ll learn from the stories embedded in their NFTs.
There will be a limited supply of 6,006 CryptoPoops in existence (Get it!? Type that into your TI-83 and turn it upside down). The pricing for earlier CryptoPoops will be lower to reward early adopters, but we’re keeping the ramp quite low compared to other projects. We want these CryptoPoops to fling far and wide, becoming the fertilizer from which a thousand fun ecosystem projects bloom. Ok, we’re not great at analogies.
This muscular local news hero was expelled in Belgium but now lives in a backyard lawn.
In addition to what’s randomly generated, we are painstakingly crafting some of the finest shit you’ve ever seen. We will be auctioning off some of these premium poops, and hope that they find loving homes where they are cherished! Others will be randomly awarded to anyone who owns a CryptoPoop at the time of the giveaway (which shall remain a mystery for now... Our Discord is where news will always drop first, so join now!)
Enthusiastic, helpful early supporters might even find one on their doorstep...
When you mint your very own CryptoPoops, they’ll be a mystery! They’ll have a number, they’ll be cozy in your wallet, and their traits will be stored forever in the blockchain. But they won’t reveal themselves just yet. They’ll have a mystery image at first, and even we, the developers, won’t know ahead of time what they’ll be! We’ll all find out together at The Big Reveal.
When is The Big Reveal? Exact timing will depend on how on fire the servers are in our paper bags. We’ll publicize the time well in advance in the Discord, so that everyone can find out together. (Have we mentioned the Discord? There’s a Discord! The Discord will always know things first. It’s the plumbing through which all knowledge flows - and some giveaways flow there too!)
We are but simple folk; a Shitty Avengers, assembling when needed. We saw that people were shitting on NFTs and, in that moment, we knew what we must do.
Most importantly, CryptoPoops wouldn’t exist without the help of our amazing friends and supporters, and entire crypto communities, which have been so welcoming as we learned.
First, say that out loud :) We imagine you'll find yourself reminded that the value of NFTs is pretty subjective, and sometimes things unexpectedly go to shit! So you shouldn't be spending money you'll need for real life tissue paper.
That said, crypto art and collectibles mean different things to different people, so you'll need to use your own judgment. We really love these things, and we think you will too.
They’re real and they’re spectacular. We won’t be able to hold them in for much longer...
You own your CryptoPoops, so you can do whatever you like with them! You might show them off in your profile on Showtime, resell them on OpenSea, or go nuts and wrap them in ERC-20s to use in DeFi (If you don’t know what that means, that’s fine! It’s possible that many experiences can happen for different interests).
We’re launching with the ability for developers to build games, gambling, alternate universes, you name it. We don’t know what people will build, but we’re excited to find out.
Besides being the shittiest NFTs on the market, CryptoPoops are made for fun! And that probably means experiences we’d never think of.
Third-party developers can integrate deeply with our smart contract to mint, burn, and mutate your CryptoPoops on your behalf (with your consent, of course). This makes for interesting market dynamics and exciting possibilities for a... “Poopiverse”? Hm.
The way we're building the smart contract means that the community can build on top of CryptoPoops in cool new ways. Not just inserting our NFTs into their DApps either: if you’re a developer, we’ll even be able to delegate to you the original mint and burn mechanics themselves, or allow you to mutate their DNA.
What does this mean? An unprecedented level of apps & economic games. What does that mean? Well shit, we don’t know yet! That’s what’s so interesting. No one - including the developers - know where this “shitty-conomy” will go. But we expect exciting market dynamics will emerge as people build. Here some ideas we expect might be built:
If you’ve got ideas, we want to hear from you.
This project doesn't have a shitty bonding curve. Everyone poops, so poops are available for everyone.
There's a slightly cheaper tier for early adopters because they gave a shit before everyone else.
CryptoPoops adhere to the ERC-721 standard so you can trade them on platforms like OpenSea, or anywhere else fine NFTs are sold.
If you want to be ready for the drop, you’ll need Ether in your wallet. If you’re new to crypto, that’s ok. This might take a while, so take a pit stop before we leave!